Tuesday, May 01, 2007 @5:16 PM
back from ms lim's house. we had a buffet lunch. it's post syf celebration! whee. ok. i went late cos i walked there. haha. asked qh to join after that since lao shi was wondering where she was. i'm beginning to feel that i should not have asked her. wasted loads of her time. ): haiz.. i really need to do lots of reflection. maybe sometimes i just think too much for myself. i want to be with my friends and yet i have to keep in mind she is alone and craves for attention too. she may not mind but that's not the point. she must have felt very awkward. i'm sad.
it's great to see so many of my friends gathered together although i didnt get to speak to most of them. just glad that they were there and i've seen how much they have grown, especially the NY juniors. from two years ago till now. the sight two years ago really comes back to me. it's so crystal clear to me now. great jobs gals. i'm so proud of all of you. may you keep the strong bond and continue to be the best. love all you so much! and my batch's buddies. i know we're not in the same school anymore. at least me and jieying are not in the same school as marilyn and huimin. yea. but it's so great to see you all! (: although i dont seem to be able to talk much with you all, as i left NYGZ earlier.. it's great to know all of you care for me. you all are still that crazy like when we were still together! i'm so glad that we're that batch of NYGZ players. just the 4 of us. thanks loads.
and not forgetting this batch of njgz seniors, same batch buddies and the juniors. actually, i'm quite sad that the juniors only stick to one another. must really get them to bond with us. but at least the JC ppl can talk together. we also took pictures. i forgot to bring mine! RAH. it's glad to keep all these pictures for memories. wow. imagine ten years later you take out the book where you pasted all the pictures. i think i'll cry. i'll be so touched. it's really great to have so many friends around you. you're not alone! (:
anyway, i'm just so not myself recently. somehow i think i'm so particular how people view me. it's difficult to say in words but i feel this sense of unease everytime. i really dont know. maybe it's just me. and when i'm with my friends, i suddenly feel i have nothing to say. or at least i cant be high like how i sometimes is. i really dont know what's wrong with me. i'm really feeling terrible now. whats's wrong. i've my own problems which i never shared and i yearn for it to go away some day. i'm sure i can figure it out someday. it's just all my wild thoughts. haiz..
ok. i feels better to have written out my thoughts and feelings. back to work.