Sunday, May 27, 2007 @9:25 AM
i'm so glad i can blog now. couldnt connect to the internet for this whole week and i'm so worried for my econs va. phew. finally can use the net again. i'm so so relieved. i've been so tired for the week. especially from thursday onwards. let me do some update. (:
tuesdayhad lesson in the morning. after that i stayed so that i can play percussion! wow. thanks you chuen. (: percussion's so fun! omg. i want to switch. i hope i can perform at aurora but i think the chances are very low. the percussion ppl dont seem so friendly.. ): people start asking me why i want to switch. i guess it's a human nature to want to try smth new. for me, i definitely dont want to give up on gz. i want to try smth new so that i understand how it feels like to be the person who does not know the instrument. it helps me better understand friends, juniors who just join the cca. i guess like that i'll be better at communicating with them, at least to know how they feel. i hope others will understand why i'm doing this. (:
wednesdayhad GP from 8-9.40am. slacked till 2pm and went out with Michelle to get Bryan's birthday gift. we bought him a burger pig! wow! haha. i hope it fills his stomach well, what with all the macs we eat on practically every saturday.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRYAN! (:
thursdaythis is a long, tired but extremely exciting day. went to science centre in the afternoon to help out with sisc. me and my friends were meal helpers. we help to serve people food! so fun right! actually, it's fun cos we get to eat the food. the food's good. (: my friends even packet home. oops. haha. yup. so at first it was quite bad cos we dont know how much to give. then in the end, there was quite a lot of leftovers. so sad. so we learnt to ration food well. (: yup. oh and we have to wear ethnic costumes. omg. thursay was indian. wow. so i borrowed qh's indian costume. (: luckily for her, if not i'll have to wear a sari which i dont even know how to wear. haha. ok. after lunch, i went back to school for maths lesson. 2-3.30pm. it was so stuffy and i was so tired, i cant be bothered. kind of slept through the lesson. that's bad. after that i went back to clementi with sixuan to meet ziyin and the rest to go to NUS hostel to serve dinner. yup. the dinner was also indian style. i like the mutton! omg. actually i packed some food home but threw them away cos the mutton sauce leaked and i thought i was too gross to bring home. we left around 8+. waited for the shuttle bus for such a long time. by the time we reached clementi, it was 9+. so i decided to take a cab with zy and zt. the adventure starts. the taxi driver turned into PIE. he did not know there was a jam. this is bad. all taxi drivers should listen to the radio for traffic news! it was only when i got home that my parents told me PIE had been jamming since the afternoon. wow. i'm really pissed with the taxi driver. ok. back to the jam. so zy, zt and me got off the taxi in the middle of PIE since we decided that we dont know where the jam will end and that the meter had jumped from $3.10 to $10.00 and we only moved a short distance. so we walked to the side and started walking on the grass. i know this i s terrible as it's so dangerous but what else can we do? we need to reach home asap. so we walked till we cant walk on the grass anymore and we climbed up to where we saw private houses, asked for directions and went to bukit timah. i'm so sad cos zt was dragged into the situation by me. i dont know him before thursday. and so was ziyin. i should not have asked her to take a cab with me. haiz.. in the end, i reached home at 11.30pm. thank goodness my parents did not scold me. i'm glad that they understand.
fridayclosing ceremony for sisc. my class got selected to go. wanted to take MC cos i wasnt feeling well but do i have a choice? haiz.. so i went to school to realize the last min information that we dont need to wear a tie. i went to buy a while ago! haiz.. we went to ngee ann poly really early at around 2+ to 3 when the concert only begins at 4pm. wow. wasted loads of time. it was ok throughout. we got to see the 4 syf dances. they were great i should say. (: after that took 74 to change bus at mac ritchie. i'm reminded of thursday as the bus went pass the exact places. haiz..
saturdayhad NRP in the morning then went for Bryan's birthday party. i was back at clementi at 9+. again. ): thanks michelle's dad for sending me there though. if not i'll not be able to make it home any earlier. (:
some reflection:
after the thursday incident, i guess i'm never going to trust taking the taxi. i'll rather take the mrt train or public bus. i'm quite afraid of taxis now. i just dont know why. maybe i should take some time off and i hope i'll be better. (:
Saturday, May 19, 2007 @10:53 PM
had ms tan's farewell yesterday. i'm glad that it went smoothly and i can see that ms tan enjoyed herself even though loads of things that should not happen happened. i guess it's always like this. nothing turns out the way one imagines it. this is what i learnt after many years. in fact. i admit giving up totally and not caring about the farewell planning two days before. i'm really thankful to have such a wonderful bunch of friends. they're the ones who helped me. like what QQ said, "when the sky falls down, i'll be there to help you hold it." thanks loads. yup. QQ and adeline helped in collecting the 2kg cake from KAP. my thank you list once again:
1) jiafang and chenye who collected the flowers from coro
2) lisian and the rest who helped decorated the amphi
3) yaorong for carrying all the heavy stuff
4) CO ppl who helped out in one way or another
5) everyone who came
6) kaixin who kept on reminding me not to be pessimistic
7) everyone who wrote in ms tan's farewell gift
8) shenyang for providing the paper for ms tan's gift
9) seniors for coming back
10) everyone for putting in the effort for the performance
11) JOYCELYN!! haha. she and I were so happy when we found the cups, paper plates and forks and spoons! (:
thanks loads everyone for everything. if not for you all, i dont know how the farewell would have gone. it would have been a nightmare. i'm glad that it went well, better than what i expected. thanks loads really. i hope you all enjoyed yourselves too. uh. besides watching whoever doing the stupid dance. -.-
Sunday, May 13, 2007 @4:48 PM
i've been really busy these days. or rather i've been rather stressed out. i see more white hair on my head recently. ): i was telling my mum i cant think properly. or at least i cant tell when my friends crack brain teasing jokes. i've become slower and slower at getting that it's a joke. oh no! what's exactly wrong with me? the worse thing is i think i'm putting in loads of effort for something that not many people will recognize. i dont know. ppl know i've doing it but it just doesnt seem to be the way it should be. i've been sacrificing my dinner time with my family so that i can stay back later in school to finish up with those work. i'm not being myself. what went wrong? and when i reach home, i sit at my desk for an hour and i doze off. i go to sleep trying to wake up at 3am to no avail. in the end i cant complete any of my work properly. am i that stressed out? thought i managed to pull through so many stuff.. i've learnt to cope with more work. what happened? haiz.. i'm feeling really lost.
common test is coming in like less than 2 months. i should be studying or at least start on the notes. there's so much to study and yet i'm doing other stuff. maybe i should close down this blog too. in school, i cant concenttrate during lect.. all i do is copy and copy, i cant even process the things taught and when i reach home, i dont have the time to go through my work. i'm really thinking i't's my way of studying. i'm feeling terrible now. i'm having this headache. i dont want to fall sick. i've been taking so many blue slips. this is bad.
i guess i should be back doing my work. it's gd to have typed it out. there are so many things i want to say but i cant find the time to type them out. haiz.. i guess it just have to come and go. that's life isn't it? yup. that's all. i hope i'll be able to find a great solution as i study and move on in life. jia you!
to all my buddies, i know i'm not alone and i'm glad. you all must jia you too! we'll pull through these periods together (:
Tuesday, May 01, 2007 @5:16 PM
back from ms lim's house. we had a buffet lunch. it's post syf celebration! whee. ok. i went late cos i walked there. haha. asked qh to join after that since lao shi was wondering where she was. i'm beginning to feel that i should not have asked her. wasted loads of her time. ): haiz.. i really need to do lots of reflection. maybe sometimes i just think too much for myself. i want to be with my friends and yet i have to keep in mind she is alone and craves for attention too. she may not mind but that's not the point. she must have felt very awkward. i'm sad.
it's great to see so many of my friends gathered together although i didnt get to speak to most of them. just glad that they were there and i've seen how much they have grown, especially the NY juniors. from two years ago till now. the sight two years ago really comes back to me. it's so crystal clear to me now. great jobs gals. i'm so proud of all of you. may you keep the strong bond and continue to be the best. love all you so much! and my batch's buddies. i know we're not in the same school anymore. at least me and jieying are not in the same school as marilyn and huimin. yea. but it's so great to see you all! (: although i dont seem to be able to talk much with you all, as i left NYGZ earlier.. it's great to know all of you care for me. you all are still that crazy like when we were still together! i'm so glad that we're that batch of NYGZ players. just the 4 of us. thanks loads.
and not forgetting this batch of njgz seniors, same batch buddies and the juniors. actually, i'm quite sad that the juniors only stick to one another. must really get them to bond with us. but at least the JC ppl can talk together. we also took pictures. i forgot to bring mine! RAH. it's glad to keep all these pictures for memories. wow. imagine ten years later you take out the book where you pasted all the pictures. i think i'll cry. i'll be so touched. it's really great to have so many friends around you. you're not alone! (:
anyway, i'm just so not myself recently. somehow i think i'm so particular how people view me. it's difficult to say in words but i feel this sense of unease everytime. i really dont know. maybe it's just me. and when i'm with my friends, i suddenly feel i have nothing to say. or at least i cant be high like how i sometimes is. i really dont know what's wrong with me. i'm really feeling terrible now. whats's wrong. i've my own problems which i never shared and i yearn for it to go away some day. i'm sure i can figure it out someday. it's just all my wild thoughts. haiz..
ok. i feels better to have written out my thoughts and feelings. back to work.